Why Karshitha and I Don’t Get Along: A Reflection on Mindsets and Differences

I am a simple human being who believes in clear communication. I don’t assume expectations from others unless they explicitly tell me, nor do I concern myself with what others think of me unless they express it in crystal-clear words. Making assumptions takes unnecessary effort, and trying to read between the lines in social situations often leads to inaccurate conclusions. I prefer to invest my energy elsewhere—on things that truly matter.

This clear-headed mindset has largely been shaped by my years at Dhammathali Vipassana Centre, Jaipur, where I actively served for six years. During this time, I listened to countless stories from people of all walks of life. Over time, I noticed that human experiences tend to follow familiar patterns—the names, places, and characters may change, but the core stories remain the same.

One key lesson I’ve learned is that hating people is a waste of energy. It’s far more efficient to accept people as they are and find ways to navigate relationships with them. If you can find a way to make it work—great! If not, it’s best to let things be. Time often brings clarity, and until then, maintaining distance is sometimes the best approach.

Where Things Go Wrong with Karshitha

I genuinely appreciate Karshitha for her dedication to service and her commitment as a human being. At times, she is simple and easy to deal with. However, when it comes to tasks that involve others, things get complicated.

Her approach is highly directional—she assigns tasks and insists that people complete them according to her expectations, often disregarding their time and commitments. This is where things turn toxic. If you meet her expectations, she is happy; if not, she reacts in a way that is neither professional nor respectful.

Personality Clashes: A Difference in Outlook

Beyond work, she tends to be extremely judgmental. She holds illogical feminist views, and her communication skills are poor. While I can understand where this might stem from, it does not make interactions any easier.

I generally see two types of people in the world:

1. Those who work for a cause – They stay true to their identity, focus on meaningful work, and aren’t concerned with validation.
2. Those who seek validation – They work to please others, often treating people poorly in the process.

People who seek validation are usually shaped by past struggles—overparenting, negative experiences with the opposite gender, or a lack of reassurance in their lives. When they don’t receive enough acknowledgment, they develop insecurities, become judgmental, and continuously strive to prove their worth. Their life becomes a race to become something.

This is exactly the case with Karshitha.

• She judges other people’s relationships because hers wasn’t successful.
• She criticizes others’ ways of life because she hasn’t figured out her own.
• She looks down on others’ professions because she doesn’t have one.
• She is critical of men because of her past negative experiences.

She judges others for everything she lacks.

A peaceful person doesn’t waste energy judging others because there is simply no need. Everyone finds their own way to evolve and grow.

Why Our Interaction Doesn’t Work

Unlike Karshitha, I never felt like I had to struggle much in life. Other than my health crisis in 2018, nothing ever felt like a real struggle to me. Even when I was financially broke, I had good friends who supported me. For years, I had more money than I could spend, so I lived a comfortable life in my own way. Then, I found Vipassana, and life became even more meaningful. Now, I’m taking a break to build tech projects, and I have a strong support system around me. Life has always been smooth, so I don’t have much to complain about.

Now, when two completely different people interact, misunderstandings are inevitable.

• She takes everything seriously and overthinks every detail.
• I am the opposite—I don’t take anything seriously, not even her.

Even though I strive for peace, I refuse to be a victim of someone else’s insecurities. I can’t help someone who doesn’t allow me to be in that space.

Since I don’t tolerate mediocrity, these days she usually keeps her distance from me, even when I’m around. And if she tries to play her usual games, I make sure to push her even further away.

And that’s why Karshitha and I don’t get along.

The Weird Connections We All Have

We’re all connected in ways we don’t even realize. If you say something about someone—good or bad—it will reach them eventually. Most people underestimate this phenomenon.

We’re also part of a societal web. I live with three friends, and through them, I know countless tiny details about people I’ve never even met. This happens to everyone—it’s just how human connections work.

However, there’s a difference between knowing something and using it. If someone shares something with me in good faith, I treat it like attorney-client privilege. I don’t use it in arguments, and I don’t respect people who do.

Disclaimer: The name in this article has been tweaked to ensure the anonymity of the person involved. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!